Living with mom after 30 😳

Living with mom after 30….. Ok it’s not exactly as sad and pitiful as it sounds. 😂 We are building a house. In order to get our old house ready and on the market, we moved out of it.

We are redoing the kitchen floors and refinishing the downstairs hardwoods since the dogs nails destroyed them. We would have to be out for a week while all this got done, so we just moved into my moms house. Rather than move back and have to gather up both kids and two large dogs every time someone wanted to come view the house, we figured staying at my moms during the selling process was just easier. The idea of having to scramble to clean up a million toys and the mass amounts of dog hair before someone comes to see the house (possible multiple times a day) just gives me anxiety. Not to mention, with all this Coronavirus stuff still flying around, I don’t want to have to disinfect everything each time after someone views it.

So yup, I’m living with my mom after 30! But not in a sad and pitiful way! 😂 Do say a prayer that we don’t drive her crazy before the house is built. The boys and I are a lot to handle. Their toys alone have pretty much swallowed up every bit of free space the house had.🤷🏼‍♀️

Well behaved kids

My father-in-law gave me the biggest compliment the other day. He said my kids were the most well behaved kids he’s ever met. This might not seem like a big deal to most people, but I took it as a major compliment!

I work very hard to help my kids learn to be respectful and kind even at a young age. Don’t get me wrong, we aren’t without our temper tantrums and meltdowns. But those I don’t consider to be completely behavioral. They’re typically related to communication struggles and frustrations in understanding their own emotions. So I consider meltdowns and temper tantrums to be more learning and developmental related vs behavioral. Not to mention, they are starting to become few and far between. A majority of ours were due to my toddlers lack of communication since he was struggling with words. Now that he’s gotten more words, he’s less frustrated and able to voice what he needs. So we saw a significant drop in temper tantrums and meltdowns.

I’ve also worked really hard to change my mindset. I used to get so frustrated with my toddler when he would have a meltdown or temper tantrum. After I learned they were mainly due to his frustration in not being able to communicate, I was able to change my thinking and my actions. When he has a meltdown, I try really hard to talk to him softly, hug him or sometimes just let him be. Sometimes he needs a hug and other times he just needs his space. Same as adults!

Meltdowns and temper tantrums aside, my kids really are pretty well behaved! They listen well (most of the time.) They are good with following directions and doing what’s asked of them. My oldest loves to please people. If you ask him to do something and he does it, he gets so proud of himself. Sometimes I have him do goofy little tasks for me just because I know it makes him so happy and proud to help mommy.

By no means am I saying my kids are better than anyone else’s. I’m just saying how proud I am of them and how I appreciate someone pointing out how well behaved they are. It makes me feel like I’m doing something right and navigating this parenting stuff successfully!

Toddler stages

Well, we are in that toddler stage where I am constantly asking my child not to put his hands in his mouth or to lick things. Yes, I said lick things. I caught him licking the window yesterday. And the playhouse. And the wall. And the dog.🤦🏼‍♀️ I think some days he does it just to annoy me or see how I’ll react. 🤷🏼‍♀️

With all the Coronavirus craziness, now is the worst time for him to be doing that! I’m following him around like a crazy person cleaning up after him, making him wash his hands, etc.

Good news is, none of us have left the house for anything but essentials. One person (my husband) is the only one who does the essentials run. We follow every rule. We disinfect packages, food packages, and anything that comes into the house. When we go on walks, we stay more than 6 feet away from people. If we see someone walking down the sidewalk towards us, we cross the street to be safe. Hands are washed regularly and surfaces are cleaned more than ever.

When your kid says the “S” word

Yesterday I took my kids on a walk around the neighborhood. There were a decent amount of people out and about. While walking, my 2 year old started yelling out “sh*t sh*t. I want to sh*t.” Yup, people looked at me like oh my gosh do you hear him? Ya I heard him! And I just laughed! 😂

Normally I’d freak out and tell him to stop immediately and explain to him why we don’t say that. But this quarantine has had me cooped up for too long. Momma just needed a good laugh. And I got one with this, because my kid wasn’t actually saying sh*t. He was saying SIT. He was tired and wanted to sit down. 😂

He’s 2. His words aren’t perfect. So to all the neighbors in Plano that heard my kid yelling out what they thought was a cuss word…..sorry? 🤷🏼‍♀️

Should I have corrected him? Maybe. But again he’s two, is just learning words, and momma needed that laugh 🤭

Wash your hands!

Apparently the flu risk is high in Dallas right now. I never used to get the flu shot but after having kids I do. The last thing I want is one of us (or all of us) catching it. I feel like we are more at risk of getting it with them being around other kids now. So many little hands in mouths! 🖐🏻

I’ve been having both my toddler and infant wash their hands like crazy. I’ve also been disinfecting toys regularly, especially with Camden in the teething phase and chewing on everything! Most germs can survive on fabric for a while, so I change their clothes the minute they get back from day care. I’ve been washing my hands more than normal as well. With the Coronavirus flying around I feel like we can never be too safe! 🙅🏼‍♀️

Here’s a couple random facts that might get you thinking……🤔

Did you know that low humidity enables the flu to survive longer and spread faster?! Also, people spread germs more easily in cold weather due to more time indoors together. 🏡

1 in 10 people don’t wash their hands after using the bathroom. This is one major way we spread germs! We were taught this when we were kids! 95% of people don’t wash their hands long enough to kill harmful bacteria. The CDC recommends washing your hands for 20 seconds. Not sure how long 20 seconds is? Sing your ABC’s twice through at a normal speed. That’s about 20 seconds! 🧼

Wash your hands and say a prayer you don’t catch what’s flying around! That’s about the best we can do. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Judging a child by their size

My mom told me a friend warned her that people assume more of big kids. What that means is, kids large for their age. I didn’t quite understand this at first because I’ve always been a smaller person. People only expected more of me because of my ability not my size.

My 2 year old is in the 98th percentile and has been since he was born. He stands as tall as some 4 year olds. More times than I care to count, I’ve had a mom say to me “he’s not talking in full sentences yet?” When I explain that he’s only 2 and has a handful of words, they get a shocked look on their face and say “oh I thought he was older than that.” I just sort of nod my head and smile.

I understand now what my moms friend meant. I try not to get frustrated with it or let it make me think my kid needs to be further ahead than he is. He’s only 2! And, every child is different. Ryder has always done things at his own pace but he’s always hit the milestones.

It’s hard ignoring people and their comments but when it comes to him I try really hard. Every kid is different. That’s what I keep telling myself 💙

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Independence

Did you know that as a child becomes more independent, sometimes a mother will non-consciously look for issues to feel more needed?

Mind you, this does not happen to every mother. But it is a very common thing to have happen. It’s understandable that it does. It’s human nature to like to feel needed and wanted. Especially when you’ve had someone like a child, who was so dependent on you for so long, go from heavy dependence to independence. I can understand how it’s a hard switch for the parent.

Sadly this is something that doesn’t just happen once. It’s something that happens often over a child’s life. A baby goes from needing to be carried everywhere, to learning to crawl and eventually walk. Toddlers move into a stage where they start to learn how to do things on their own, so they want to do EVERYTHING on their own. And this need for independence continues through the tween, teen and early adult years.

I can understand why being a mom is hard now. Going from being needed, to not being needed as much or at all is a hard transition. It definitely can take a toll on you emotionally! 🙁