Terrible twos was definitely a bit brutal! People told me it was rough, but it wasn’t what I was expecting. The random melt downs, complete defiance, temper tantrums, etc. I knew he would push his limits but lord!!! Mix in the fact that he was still learning to talk and it made things so much more difficult for both of us. He would try to tell me something and got frustrated because I didn’t understand what he’s saying or wanting.
Every day I was exhausted! It’s an exhausted I’d never felt before. It’s a mix of mental and physical exhaustion. But weirdly enough, he wasn’t exhausted (ever)! It’s like the terrible twos upped his energy level. I was worn out well before he was. His bed time would come around and I was the one who needed to go to bed.
What didnt help was other moms telling me “wait till he’s 3 that’s worse than 2.” Come on people!!! Give a new mom a glimmer of hope! I need to see the light at the end of the tunnel and comments like this don’t help!
We are now at 3 and it’s a whole other ball game. He’s now able to talk, very well actually. But he still doesn’t know how to verbalize his feelings or emotions. So when tiredness comes over him and he’s ready for a nap, a lot of the time he just goes crazy. He’s not that kid who tells me he wants to go nap. He has always hated napping. Instead he acts out or throws things. What’s funny is he will throw something, look at me and go “mommy I’m being bad” and sometimes he actually goes and puts himself in timeout! It takes every bit of strength in my body not to die laughing. Because let’s be honest….the wrath of a toddler who’s in a mood and you laugh at him….nope I’m not going there!
He is a good boy. A very good boy. He’s so loving and does try to help out and share with his brother. We are just in a stage. I try to remind myself of that. Obviously in the moment it’s not exactly the thought going through my head. Most thoughts are more like “dear god please make this stop.” 😂 But as bad as I say it is, it could be worse. He isn’t as bad as some horror stories I’ve heard. He really is a good little boy. He is just learning and trying to figure out his emotions and life in general! 💙
Yesterday the day started with one kid peeing ON my pillow. I’m still debating on whether to put it in the wash and bleach it or call it a loss and just throw it away. 🛌
It was then followed by Ryder taking off his shorts and diaper and running naked through the house. He was kind enough to take me by the hand and show me where he peed on the floor during his streaking episode. 🚽
Ryder’s new thing is sticking his hands down his pants…..we knew the day would come as it does with every little boy. However, we have started with the back side of our pants. It took all my energy not to fall over laughing when ryder stuck his hands down into his diaper, only to remember he had just pooped. He pulled his hands out and they were covered with poop. It was HILARIOUS to see the look on his face. Then I realized I had to clean him up. It stopped being funny…… 🧼
That afternoon Ryder decided he wanted to have a party while I was changing Camden’s diaper. He went into the pantry and took out the paper plates and flung them all over the kitchen. He then took out the remaining plastic wine glasses from a previous party and lined them up on the floor. He filled those glasses with animal crackers from his snack bowl. The dog decided to join the party and ate some of the animal crackers. He also took out any boxed food item and stacked them as high as he could. 🐶
During another of Camden’s diaper changes, Ryder thought it would be funny to go in the closet, shut the door and sit quietly giving mommy a heart attack as she ran around the house panicked trying to find him. 🚪
Dinner consisted of 75% of the meal ending up in Ryder’s lap or on the floor. (We are still trying to master our silverware skills.) So of course right before bed he was starving and asking for more food. Guess what I gave him……the remaining animal crackers in the plastic cups! 😂
Would I say this was a bad day? No. It was definitely a battle of a day but not our worst! We are all in one piece still. So I’d say it was just one of our more “busy” days. 🤷🏼♀️
Being a stay-at-home mom I’m often asked “what do you do all day?” Sometimes it’s asked harmlessly, and other times it’s asked as if the person thinks I just lay around and watch tv all day. It actually makes me laugh when someone asks that. Some of the time I want to make up something ridiculous just to see what they say in response. 😂
But truthfully my days are never “relaxing.” I don’t get much downtime. Once Ryder started walking, any free minute I had was taken up by chasing him around and cleaning. This kid can destroy a room in under 2 minutes. Yet it takes me at least 10-15 minutes to put the room back together. 🤦🏼♀️
His favorite thing to do is take things out of drawers and move them other places. Yesterday he emptied out two clothing drawers and put everything in the bathtub. While I was folding the clothes and putting them away, he was in his room taking diapers out of their bin and throwing them in the kitchen. Once that was complete he found the two kitchen drawers that aren’t baby proofed and emptied them of everything (don’t worry it’s just things like chip clips in that drawer).
The cleanup is never ending. I can’t get mad at ryder because he’s not doing it to be “mean.” He doesn’t know better. He just thinks it’s fun to empty drawers and boxes. We are working on explaining why we don’t take everything out of drawers. But each time he just looks at me like “ok mom are you done, I see another drawer to empty.” 😂
In addition to the daily pick up game, I have food to make, a house to clean, laundry to do, errands to run, etc. It’s never ending. But I’m not complaining. I do love it. 💙
So when someone asks me what I do all day, rather than give the long version, I just say they I chase Ryder around all day. That pretty much sums it up. 🤷🏼♀️
Recently I bumped into an old friend from high school. We did the usual “how have you been,” surface conversation. When that friend asked me where I was now working and I told them I was a stay at home mom…..you should have seen their face. It actually made me laugh out loud. That friend apologized for the look, although it wasn’t necessary, and said they never would have expected that of me. I was such a career driven person who could never sit still.
If you had told me 10 years ago that I would eventually become a stay at home mom, I probably would have laughed at you. In my mind, back then, stay at home moms had the easiest job in the world and did little to no work. I assumed they had all this free time. I thought, how hard can it be to just feed and change a child. I was so naive…..
Having not been a parent yet 10 years ago, I had NO IDEA how much energy and work goes in to raising a child. I feel like I owe all stay at home moms an apology for thinking (never saying out loud) they had it easy. I get it now! There are very few “easy” moments. I don’t get time to sit down. Ryder is always on the go, especially now walking. Most days Im just doing my best to make sure he’s fed well and doesn’t injure himself. By days end I’m more exhausted than I was working in corporate America or teaching/coaching high schoolers.
It’s definitely a different world I’m in now. But I don’t dislike anything about it or regret it at all. Some days are easier than others. But I look at it like a new adventure. No it’s not a paying job but it’s so incredibly rewarding. To be able to see every little thing Ryder does every day and not miss a minute of it is more than I could ask for.
Don’t get me wrong, there are days where I miss certain parts of my previous jobs. When I was a PM I was always traveling, presenting to large groups and doing something huge within the automotive world. I literally felt on top of the world. Then teaching and coaching I was working with students and athletes. Helping them learn in the classroom and at practice. Getting to see them excel was such a good feeling. But like I said, I wouldn’t change anything. I loved both of those jobs at the different times of my life that I worked them. I’m now in a different stage of life with a new “job.” One that I never really saw myself doing but am so incredibly grateful I have the opportunity to do.
My advice to everyone is to never judge someone based off their “job.” There are different stresses and difficulties that come with every job. Some bigger than others and some easier than others. We all have our battles. But please don’t ever discredit someone for doing a job like raising their child.