Tag Archives: Mom life

Photos when you’re gone

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I saw the best quote the other day. It reminded me a bit of my mom.

“One day, all your children will have is pictures of you. Make sure you’re in them. No matter what your hair looks like, your makeup, or your body. They won’t care about any of that. They will just want to see you.”

Looking back through photo albums I don’t have many pictures of me with my mom or even of just my mom. She is one of those people who is incredible critical of herself. So she wouldn’t be in pictures or let anyone take one of her if she didn’t feel she looks her best.

I’ve had days like that where I didn’t want my picture taken because I felt I looked like crap. But lately I’ve made a conscious effort to take pictures of me with my boys. I have days where I go a week without washing my hair, I have no makeup on and my shirt is stained with god know what one of them got on me. But I still join in on the picture. I don’t want them going back through photos and not having many or any of me. I want them to be able to look back at picture and remember me and the days we had together when I’m gone. 💙

I sneakily take a lot of pictures of my mom with my boys. 95% of them she would hate if she saw them. Only because of how critical she is of herself. But I don’t show them to her. I probably send her a few every so often. And of course only the ones I know she will approve of herself in. 😉 I take them so my boys will have them one day. So they will be able to go back and see pictures of Gramma and the things they did together.

We don’t know how long we will be on this Earth. Pictures are one of the few things we can leave behind to help our loved ones remember those special times. 💙

Terrible Two’s

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The “terrible two’s” have begun. I always wondered why people called it that. I’m learning…..just FYI, kids in their “terrible two’s aren’t bad kids. They haven’t turned bad, weren’t previously bad, etc. They are just at a struggling point. 😩

Around the age of 2 kids are learning how to communicate. They’re stuck in a world where they are learning words, and only know a few at a time. They want to communicate but they don’t know exactly how to get their emotions across with words. Not to mention dealing with their own emotions can be overwhelming enough as it is. It can be incredibly frustrating for a little one so temper tantrums and melt downs are extremely common. 😞

The easiest way to get through the “terrible twos” is to be patient and work with your child. Help them with words, and try to be understanding. Know that the temper tantrums aren’t done to punish or embarrass you. They are just extremely overwhelmed and that’s how they handle it. 👍🏻

It’s extremely frustrating at times but you sort of have to put yourself in your kids shoes. Imagine how frustrating how it can be for them. 💙

Mistakes

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I realize now that I made quite a few “mistakes” with Ryder. Mistake might not be the best word to use since everything really was a learning experience. I’m just realizing now, I maybe should have done some things a different way than I originally did. Although, how are you to really learn/know without a little trial and error? 🤷🏼‍♀️

You can follow all the baby books and advice you want. But not everything “recommended” will work for your child. Sometimes you just have to throw out the books, ignore what everyone says (except your doctor) and just try your own thing! Your first child is like the experiment child. You figure it out as you go! 👶🏻

I get less anxiety when Camden cries. When Ryder would cry I would immediately panic to try to figure out what he wanted/needed. I actually caused myself unnecessary stress. With Cam I just listen. He has certain cries to give me cues if he’s hungry, tired, etc. Sometimes he just cries for a minute as if he’s confused as to what he wants. I let him do his thing and then he’s done as if nothing happened.

I’ve also got this diaper changing thing down now! I get peed on less and I’m more prepared for the projectile poops! I know the wall appreciates it. It saw its fair share of poop splatter the first time around!

Ryder has been the best little guinea pig a mom could ask for! I was way more prepared this second time around and definitely a bit more confident thanks to him. 😂💙

For your next one…..

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People: For your next one will you try for a girl since you have two boys? 👦🏼

Me: Nah I think we’ll try for a puppy. But if not, a baby is just fine. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Seriously this question makes me laugh so I always answer it with something ridiculous. Not to mention, I JUST had a baby. I’d like to focus on these two right now before I think about anything else baby wise.

Will we have another one? Maybe, probably, who knows. It’s sort of in gods hands whether we have another or not. It doesn’t matter to me WHAT it is if we have another. I’d just pray that it be happy and healthy.

For my first baby I was dead set on having a boy. I knew the minute I got pregnant I was meant to be a boy mom. However, if Ryder had been a girl I wouldn’t have been upset. A baby is a baby and I would have loved it no matter what it was. 💙

Nursing in public

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Nursing in public…..to do it or not to do it…..🍼

I’m one of those moms who isn’t comfortable nursing my child in public. I’m just a little squeamish about people looking at me or giving me unwanted attention, so I prefer to go to a different room, bathroom, etc. Thats just how I am. However, I have no issue with people who want to nurse their child in public. More power to them! If I had the guts to do it I would! 👶🏻

By law it is legal in all 50 states for a woman to nurse her baby anywhere in public or private that she chooses.

If you see someone doing it and it bothers you, MOVE! They have a right to feed their child wherever and whenever they want. You however have no right to make judgement. If it makes you uncomfortable, then use those legs god gave you and go somewhere else.

Another baby?

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Do y’all want another baby? 👶🏻

I’ve gotten that question so many times it actually makes me laugh. I mean, I literally just popped one out! Give me some time people! 😂

Before I was married and had kids I was constantly questioned “when are you getting married?” As if I knew exactly when it would happen. I understand people mean it in a harmless way. But there’s different ways to say or ask things. And in all honestly, that’s not exactly an appropriate question to ask. It’s not the best feeling to be asked when you’re getting married if you don’t have a boyfriend, haven’t had that conversation or aren’t in that place yet. There isn’t, and shouldn’t be a schedule for that type of thing. Everyone should just do things on their own time.

There’s definitely a time and a place to ask certain questions. I don’t mind people asking if I want to have another baby. I just think days/weeks after I JUST popped one out isn’t exactly the appropriate time. I’m focused on my two current ones. Taking care of a newborn and a 2 year old is a lot of work. I need time to find my footing before I even think about a third one.

Right now my only future thought is when will my next shower be? That’s about as far into the future as I can plan right now. 🤷🏼‍♀️

3 weeks post delivery

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Almost 3 weeks post delivery. My body isn’t ready for regular workouts yet but I had been itching to just get out and move. Camden and I have started coming up to our golf club and just walking the track. It’s nothing major but gets me out of the house and moving! 🏃‍♀️

I’m not in a huge rush to lose the baby weight this time. With Ryder I was so panicked about the extra weight and wanted to get in the gym the day after I had him to start working it off. (I didn’t but I wanted to)💪🏻

This time around I’m taking it slow. I know I can get the weight off. So rather than pushing myself like a crazy person, I’m just taking my time and easing into everything. The weight will come off in due time. I’m more focused on making sure I get in enough calories daily and am eating good foods to fuel Camden! 🍎

Epidurals

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Epidurals…..to have one or not. There’s a lot of mixed reviews. I was one who was adamant about having one. I have a decently high pain tolerance but childbirth was not a pain I wanted to endure. Plus I wanted to be able to have my full attention on what was happening. I wanted to be able to remember every second without something like debilitating pain blurring memories. 😖

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Everyone reacts differently to anesthesia. I have no major issues with it. It makes my belly itch a few hours after I’ve stopped being administered it, but that’s the only side effect I’ve ever gotten. Just because one person has a certain reaction to it, doesn’t mean you will too. Everyone’s body is different. 💪🏻

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The epidural itself was pretty quick and easy. I felt a little pressure and a small prick but I never felt any major pain when the doctor was administering it. When the medication hit my body I felt a small burn like a fresh sunburn. After that I began to feel a little tingling in my feet. Not the annoying tingling you get when your foot falls asleep. A manageable non annoying one. Within 30 minutes my legs were starting to numb, and I felt no more pain. I could feel pressure but no pain. After about an hour I could no longer move my legs on my own. I would wiggle my toes a little but I couldn’t actually feel them. 🦶🏻

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Again, everyone is different. I am a fan of epidurals and highly encourage it if your doctor gives the approval for you to have one. I was able to sleep, talk/text with people and remember every bit of the birth thanks to the epidural. Would I like to be able to say I was strong enough to endure a natural non medicated birth? Ya maybe. But I don’t know that I would have enjoyed the process and been able to relax and remember everything that I do if I hadn’t gotten medication. To each their own! Everyone is different. I am very happy with my decision and wouldn’t change anything about the process we went through. 💙

Mom Guilt

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I had no idea what I was in for when I brought Cam home from the hospital. I knew it would be different but I didn’t realize HOW different.

The first week we brought Cam home, I cried multiple times. Not from depression or anything like that. Mainly due to feeling overwhelmed and as if I was letting Ryder down.

Ryder had been so used to having 100% of my attention all the time. When Cam came home that changed and he got maybe 30% of my attention. The rest was spent feeding Cam, changing him, etc. It was really hard on Ryder, which made it hard on me. I felt so guilty I couldn’t give either boy 100% of my attention. And it’s not easy to get a toddler to understand WHY they are no longer getting all of your attention. I had a significant amount of mom guilt.

I’ve been working hard to find ways to make more time for Ryder. While Cam naps I give Ryder my full attention. My house is completely neglected and doesn’t look like it’s clean self, but I don’t care. Ryder needs me as much as he can get during this new change.

I’ve also made Ryder my little “helper.” I ask him to help me do things for Cam. Like hand me a diaper, close the wipe warmer, put away a toy, sit with us, etc. He’s proud of himself when he’s able to help out. I can see a significant change in him from day 1 to now. He doesn’t side eye his brother anymore. Lol He actually goes over to him and looks at him. Sometimes he points at things like his foot or hand and says “what’s this?” It’s progress!

I knew it would be hard, but I guess I wasn’t prepared for how hard it would be mentally and on my heart. I was just prepared for the physical aspect. This has been an eye opening experience. However, I don’t regret a minute of it. No matter how difficult, these boys are my world. 🌎

Hospital vs Home

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After delivering a baby, most people actually enjoy staying at the hospital a few days because they feel safe. There are always nurses and doctors coming in and out checking on them and their little one. There’s someone to help with anything and everything. You literally don’t have to lift a finger. It’s nice having someone (besides google) available to answer your every question.

While I enjoyed staying in the hospital, I was also completely paranoid at night. I was constantly checking Camden to make sure he was still breathing. The first night I got one hour of sleep. I literally stared at him for hours. Night two I was so exhausted I managed to peel myself away from him for two hours to sleep…….I actually didn’t sleep by choice. I was sitting up watching him, I remember looking at the clock, then the next thing I know I was waking up two hours later in a weird hunched over position. 😴

The minute we got home and Cam wanted to nap, I put his Owlet on him and laid him down. I was able to nap too without any worry. The Owlet gives me peace of mind. It’s like a second set of eyes on him except with detailed monitoring of his heart rate and oxygen levels.❤️

I would literally be a wreck without our Owlet. Thank you to whoever created it! My sanity and need to sleep thank you!! 🙏🏻