Category Archives: Toddlers

Judging a child by their size

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My mom told me a friend warned her that people assume more of big kids. What that means is, kids large for their age. I didn’t quite understand this at first because I’ve always been a smaller person. People only expected more of me because of my ability not my size.

My 2 year old is in the 98th percentile and has been since he was born. He stands as tall as some 4 year olds. More times than I care to count, I’ve had a mom say to me “he’s not talking in full sentences yet?” When I explain that he’s only 2 and has a handful of words, they get a shocked look on their face and say “oh I thought he was older than that.” I just sort of nod my head and smile.

I understand now what my moms friend meant. I try not to get frustrated with it or let it make me think my kid needs to be further ahead than he is. He’s only 2! And, every child is different. Ryder has always done things at his own pace but he’s always hit the milestones.

It’s hard ignoring people and their comments but when it comes to him I try really hard. Every kid is different. That’s what I keep telling myself 💙

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Toddler Struggles

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The start to yesterday’s temper tantrum was thanks to Ryders fingers……

His fingers couldn’t reach to the bottom of the raisin box to get the last few raisins to eat. This is where the tantrum began. It caused a full body drop to the floor, followed by rolling. It almost looked like he was practicing the “stop, drop and roll” we learned in elementary school for when we ever caught on fire. So naturally the visual and memory of that just made me laugh. Well, if you’ve ever laughed at a mad toddler, you know it’s a BAD idea. This made the tantrum even worse, and louder. He decided to throw the raisin box at me because I laughed at him. The box hit me causing the stuck raisins to break free and fly all over the floor. The dog came running into the kitchen because she thought something was wrong with him thanks to all the noise he was making. She saw all the raisins on the floor and began to eat them. So of course this caused the tantrum to continue further, because now his raisins are gone.

Mind you this went on for a good 10-15 minutes

Lesson learned for mom: put raisins in a bowl and never laugh at a mad toddler 🤦🏼‍♀️

Toddler Finds

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Last night while I was trying to rock the baby to sleep, my 2 year old walked in with a loaf of bread and handed it to me. You would have thought he had found buried treasure by the proud look on his face. I don’t know what he thought it was, but he sure thought it was something important that I needed that minute! 😂 I’ll never understand the toddler mind 🤦🏼‍♀️

Toddler in the house

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There’s nothing scarier than waking up at 4am, and hearing someone in your house going through your things……Only to find out it was your toddler who woke up and decided to have his own private play time. 🤦🏼‍♀️

Seriously though. I’ve never been more scared in my life. My husband was out of town and I was home alone with the kids. My oldest son was sleeping in bed with me because he’s still uneasy about the new baby and feeling like he’s going to get “left.” I thought I’d shut the bedroom door tight in case he did get up and wander. Clearly I didn’t. 🚪

There was a banging coming from the living room. I thought I was hearing things at first so I sat for a minute to really listen. It continued and a sort of crash followed. That’s when I knew someone was out there. Now thinking about it, if I’d been more awake I would have realized the dogs weren’t barking or going crazy. They do that if someone is just walking by the house. AND my child wasn’t in bed next to me anymore. However none of that was going through my mind at the time. The only thing I could think of was what do I do if someone is in the house? I knew I had to get to him before he got to my kids. There’s a bat under the bed so I went and grabbed that. I figured of anything I’d use my old softball skills to clobber him with the bat. 🥎

As I walked into the living room, I noticed toys everywhere. Then I saw the shadow of the intruder looked very small. That’s when it registered. It’s Ryder! The kid was up playing with his toys in the dark! I have no idea how long he was up. I’m typically a pretty light sleeper. But somehow he managed to wiggle out of my arms, get off the bed and go out into the living room all without waking me. 🛏

Just when I thought the toddler stage couldn’t get any more exhausting, mine goes and tries to give me a heart attack! ❤️

Life with two young kids

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Life with two young kids….. 👶🏻 👶🏻

Yesterday the day started with one kid peeing ON my pillow. I’m still debating on whether to put it in the wash and bleach it or call it a loss and just throw it away. 🛌

It was then followed by Ryder taking off his shorts and diaper and running naked through the house. He was kind enough to take me by the hand and show me where he peed on the floor during his streaking episode. 🚽

Ryder’s new thing is sticking his hands down his pants…..we knew the day would come as it does with every little boy. However, we have started with the back side of our pants. It took all my energy not to fall over laughing when ryder stuck his hands down into his diaper, only to remember he had just pooped. He pulled his hands out and they were covered with poop. It was HILARIOUS to see the look on his face. Then I realized I had to clean him up. It stopped being funny…… 🧼

That afternoon Ryder decided he wanted to have a party while I was changing Camden’s diaper. He went into the pantry and took out the paper plates and flung them all over the kitchen. He then took out the remaining plastic wine glasses from a previous party and lined them up on the floor. He filled those glasses with animal crackers from his snack bowl. The dog decided to join the party and ate some of the animal crackers. He also took out any boxed food item and stacked them as high as he could. 🐶

During another of Camden’s diaper changes, Ryder thought it would be funny to go in the closet, shut the door and sit quietly giving mommy a heart attack as she ran around the house panicked trying to find him. 🚪

Dinner consisted of 75% of the meal ending up in Ryder’s lap or on the floor. (We are still trying to master our silverware skills.) So of course right before bed he was starving and asking for more food. Guess what I gave him……the remaining animal crackers in the plastic cups! 😂

Would I say this was a bad day? No. It was definitely a battle of a day but not our worst! We are all in one piece still. So I’d say it was just one of our more “busy” days. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Terrible Two’s

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The “terrible two’s” have begun. I always wondered why people called it that. I’m learning…..just FYI, kids in their “terrible two’s aren’t bad kids. They haven’t turned bad, weren’t previously bad, etc. They are just at a struggling point. 😩

Around the age of 2 kids are learning how to communicate. They’re stuck in a world where they are learning words, and only know a few at a time. They want to communicate but they don’t know exactly how to get their emotions across with words. Not to mention dealing with their own emotions can be overwhelming enough as it is. It can be incredibly frustrating for a little one so temper tantrums and melt downs are extremely common. 😞

The easiest way to get through the “terrible twos” is to be patient and work with your child. Help them with words, and try to be understanding. Know that the temper tantrums aren’t done to punish or embarrass you. They are just extremely overwhelmed and that’s how they handle it. 👍🏻

It’s extremely frustrating at times but you sort of have to put yourself in your kids shoes. Imagine how frustrating how it can be for them. 💙

Mistakes

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I realize now that I made quite a few “mistakes” with Ryder. Mistake might not be the best word to use since everything really was a learning experience. I’m just realizing now, I maybe should have done some things a different way than I originally did. Although, how are you to really learn/know without a little trial and error? 🤷🏼‍♀️

You can follow all the baby books and advice you want. But not everything “recommended” will work for your child. Sometimes you just have to throw out the books, ignore what everyone says (except your doctor) and just try your own thing! Your first child is like the experiment child. You figure it out as you go! 👶🏻

I get less anxiety when Camden cries. When Ryder would cry I would immediately panic to try to figure out what he wanted/needed. I actually caused myself unnecessary stress. With Cam I just listen. He has certain cries to give me cues if he’s hungry, tired, etc. Sometimes he just cries for a minute as if he’s confused as to what he wants. I let him do his thing and then he’s done as if nothing happened.

I’ve also got this diaper changing thing down now! I get peed on less and I’m more prepared for the projectile poops! I know the wall appreciates it. It saw its fair share of poop splatter the first time around!

Ryder has been the best little guinea pig a mom could ask for! I was way more prepared this second time around and definitely a bit more confident thanks to him. 😂💙

Mom Guilt

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I had no idea what I was in for when I brought Cam home from the hospital. I knew it would be different but I didn’t realize HOW different.

The first week we brought Cam home, I cried multiple times. Not from depression or anything like that. Mainly due to feeling overwhelmed and as if I was letting Ryder down.

Ryder had been so used to having 100% of my attention all the time. When Cam came home that changed and he got maybe 30% of my attention. The rest was spent feeding Cam, changing him, etc. It was really hard on Ryder, which made it hard on me. I felt so guilty I couldn’t give either boy 100% of my attention. And it’s not easy to get a toddler to understand WHY they are no longer getting all of your attention. I had a significant amount of mom guilt.

I’ve been working hard to find ways to make more time for Ryder. While Cam naps I give Ryder my full attention. My house is completely neglected and doesn’t look like it’s clean self, but I don’t care. Ryder needs me as much as he can get during this new change.

I’ve also made Ryder my little “helper.” I ask him to help me do things for Cam. Like hand me a diaper, close the wipe warmer, put away a toy, sit with us, etc. He’s proud of himself when he’s able to help out. I can see a significant change in him from day 1 to now. He doesn’t side eye his brother anymore. Lol He actually goes over to him and looks at him. Sometimes he points at things like his foot or hand and says “what’s this?” It’s progress!

I knew it would be hard, but I guess I wasn’t prepared for how hard it would be mentally and on my heart. I was just prepared for the physical aspect. This has been an eye opening experience. However, I don’t regret a minute of it. No matter how difficult, these boys are my world. 🌎

Baby Update

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Baby update: The boys and I are slowly adjusting to life together. It’s definitely been an uphill battle. Routines have changed and the vibe in the house is very different. Even the dog is thrown off. 😂 But it’s a good different. Literally each day has a new challenge to work around and learn from. 👍🏻

Trying to get Cam and Ryder up and taken care of each morning definitely isn’t without its battles. They are both in a demanding stage and need so much of my attention. Also, a clean house isn’t the easiest task now. So I do my best just to make sure things don’t pile up. Showering is done if I’m lucky. I have to beg someone to watch the boys just to be able to rinse off. God only knows when I’ll be able to find the time to wash my hair again. Dreadlocks may be in my future! 😂

By no means am I complaining. I love the new changes in our life. And despite Ryder’s annoyed faces he gives Cam, I think he will settle in soon and realize Cam isn’t a threat. If my over possessive dog can be ok with Cam I know Ryder will be too (eventually). 🐶

When people ask what I need, my only request is positivity. I just need everyone to be positive and happy around me. If others around me are happy and positive, it helps keep my energy levels and positivity up. I focus more on the good and less on the things upsetting me or stressing me out. And trust me, with 2 little ones under two, the feeling of stress and being overwhelmed comes quick!

Dogs and kids

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One thing I’ve found interesting over the last two years is how attached my dog Sadie has become to Ryder. 🐕

When I brought him home from the hospital she snarled and growled at him. She would pace by his bed and whine. She was clearly unhappy. I really worried that she was not going to be ok with him. ❌

I gradually introduced Sadie to Ryder. I made sure to only pet her when I was holding him. I wanted her to understand that when I had him, I still loved her and would give her attention. When I wasn’t holding him I sort of ignored her. So she got rewarded for being good when he was close. After about a month she eased up and become interested in him. By the time he was 3 months old, she would actually go and lay by him. Now, he’s almost 2 and she is glued to him. She follows him all around the house. 💙

She’s really protective of him and careful of what he does. If he does something she knows he’s not supposed to she lets out this growl. It’s not a mad growl like when she growls at the mail man or lawn guys. It’s like a warning growl. As if she’s telling him not to do that. 😡

When Ryder gets too close to the pool or is in the pool and gets too close to the steps, she will actually growl and put her body in between him and the pool/steps. If he goes over by the deep end to put his hand in, she runs over and lightly nudges his arm and growls as if to tell him to tell him to stop. He’s even put things in the pool that didn’t belong there and she went to retrieve the item out of the pool, and move it far away from him. 🏊🏻

Every dog is different. I never expected Sadie to take to Ryder as well as she did, but I’m so grateful. It’s nice having a second set of “eyes” on him. She may not be able to do as much as me but I love that she tries to help keep him safe. 💙